If we’re being honest sometimes it is hard to share our testimonies. We may feel embarrassed and ashamed about things in our past. We may be afraid of the judgement that comes along with sharing our past with others. Last week my husband and I were invited to be guests on our sisters’ Tulips & Honey podcast. We prayed about it and sought guidance from some of our brothers and sisters and we decided to be completely transparent. We decided to share the good, the bad, and the ugly. I am pretty protective over my husband so when he shares his testimony, I sometimes worry about what others will think of him when they hear he spent time in prison. I use to find myself prepping people for his testimony. I would say things like “It wasn’t a violent crime.” “He is not a drug dealer.” “He made a bad choice and had a change of heart too little to late.” I found myself explaining to others that there is proof that he didn’t want to participate in this act but it was too little too late.
Sharing our testimony felt freeing. I spent 4.5 years alone as a single mom while he was away, and that time was not only a part of my testimony, but it is where my testimony really in my opinion starts. That is where my sanctification starts. I know now when I share my testimony there is no way I can leave any of it out. Why? Because it truly shows how merciful God is. It brings Him glory. When I think about our story and who we were that should show you how far God’s grace reaches. As I said earlier, I was terrible kid. I was confused and really just out of control. That kid became an adult and was just the same. I always thought that there is no way God could love a person like me. But guess what? He does. He called me and brought me into His family. Me. I am not deserving of it or worthy of it, but He called me.
Sharing your testimony with others is a beautiful thing. It is not the gospel and should never replace the gospel, but it does show the love God has for his children. I feel like, and I am sure many of you feel, as if I am part of the flock of 99 sheep, and I am the one that was lost. I wasn’t thinking about Jesus. But He came back for me. I loved my sin and was dumb enough to think I could live this life my way, or better yet, that I wanted to live this life how I wanted. Jesus saved me and my life has not (and will not) ever be the same. He disciplines us because he loves us.
Hebrews 12:6 “For the Lord disciplines the one he loves and chastises every son whom he receives.”
Don’t be ashamed of your testimony. We are not ever going to feel good about the sinful nature we once took pleasure in. We won’t ever feel good about how we grieved the Holy Spirit. However, that is just a small piece of this story. God’s grace covers the story from beginning to end. We are a part of his family. He has called us into the fold and we don’t have to be embarrassed or ashamed. He loves us.
John 10:28 says “I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.”